Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 7.0)

MONEY BECOME IMPORTANT PART OF EVERONES LIFE.NOWDAYS, PEOPLE LIVE A LAVISH LIFESYLE AND EVERYONE THINKS THAT ITS BECUASE OF MONEY. THE ESSAY REVEALS AROUND THE PEOPLES CONCEPT REGARDING MONEY IN THEIR LIFE AND ALSO GIVING REASONS FOR MONEY CAN MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY.

TO BEGIN WITH, Having a lot of money can make life easier in several ways. First, it can provide financial security and reduce stress. People with enough money do not have to worry as much about paying for food, housing, education, or unexpected expenses. For example, a person with a stable income can afford a comfortable home and good education for their children. Money can also allow people to enjoy holidays, hobbies, and other activities that bring pleasure. In addition, having financial freedom gives people more choices about how they spend their time.

However, money alone cannot guarantee happiness. Strong relationships with family and friends are extremely important because people need love, support, and companionship. Good health is another major source of happiness, as it allows people to enjoy their daily lives and participate in activities they love. Furthermore, achieving personal goals and helping others can provide a strong sense of purpose and satisfaction. For instance, volunteering in the community or spending quality time with loved ones can make a person feel happy even without spending much money.

In conclusion, money can contribute greatly to happiness by providing security, comfort, and freedom. Nevertheless, I believe that genuine and lasting happiness comes from a combination of financial stability, good relationships, health, meaningful experiences, and a sense of purpose.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the role of money in happiness and alternative sources of fulfillment. The ideas are relevant and logically extended. The introduction is slightly weak due to grammatical errors and a somewhat repetitive structure, but the body paragraphs provide clear, well-supported arguments. The position is consistent throughout, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes the main points. To reach a higher band, the introduction could be more polished, and the arguments could benefit from more nuanced exploration of the relationship between wealth and happiness.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is well-organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the benefits of money and other sources of happiness is handled smoothly using the cohesive device 'However'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. While the use of cohesive devices is generally effective, it is somewhat standard. The flow is logical, and the reader can easily follow the argument from start to finish without confusion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is sufficient for the task, allowing for clear communication of ideas. You use some good collocations such as 'financial security', 'stable income', and 'financial freedom'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a lack of more sophisticated or 'less common' lexical items that would demonstrate a higher level of control. There are also some minor errors in the introduction, such as 'REVEALS AROUND', which is an awkward collocation. Expanding your range of topic-specific vocabulary would help elevate this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is generally good control over basic grammar, and the meaning is always clear. However, the introduction contains significant errors, such as 'MONEY BECOME IMPORTANT PART OF EVERONES LIFE' (should be 'Money has become an important part of everyone's life') and 'ITS BECUASE' (spelling and apostrophe error). While the body paragraphs are much stronger and contain fewer errors, the frequency of slips in the opening section prevents a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and punctuation will improve your accuracy.

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