Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Few people believe that having a lot of money is the crucial way to be happy in life. This is true because with good finances you can live your desired life but at the same time there are few other things which gives you pleasure like time, peace.

If you have a heavy bank balance, you can buy anything you want to have like expensive clothes, Luxury cars and a big home which everyone wants. For example, People who are below poverty line struggles everyday for food. They are even not sure about their today's food. Whereas, If you have money in your pocket, you can buy a meal of your wish.

There are some other things which makes person happy. Firstly, spending quality time with your loved ones, gives you pleasure. like having a supper together makes you feel free and unwind yourself in front of your family. Furthermore, living away from hustle and bustle of life. Nowadays, no one have time for themselves. Everyone wants to live in peaceful environment where they can find peace and live happy without any stress.

I thing this is happening because people are busy in earning more and more money to meet their life standards and compromised with their health and their own desire of peace and rest. For instance, A person wants to get a luxury car for which he is doing two fulltime jobs but for just one thing he is not thinking about his body which also needs a rest to work.

In conclusion, having enough finances is not the only way to be happy in this life, There are some other things which matter to have an ideal life everyone wants.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and what other factors are important. The position is clear, and the ideas are relevant. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The explanation of why money brings happiness is supported by a basic example, but the discussion on other factors, such as 'peace' and 'time', remains a bit superficial. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed examples or deeper analysis of how these non-monetary factors specifically impact long-term well-being. The conclusion is a bit brief and could have better summarised the main points of the argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a basic progression of ideas from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as the transition 'I thing this is happening because...' which feels disconnected from the previous paragraph. Additionally, some referencing is unclear, and the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words beyond simple 'firstly' or 'furthermore' to create a smoother, more natural reading experience.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'heavy bank balance', 'poverty line', and 'hustle and bustle'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'compromised with their health' (should be 'compromise their health') and 'meal of your wish' (should be 'meal of your choice'). To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and a wider range of academic vocabulary to convey your points with greater sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the poverty line'), subject-verb agreement ('no one have time'), and punctuation (comma splices in the conclusion). Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'They are even not sure about their today's food.' While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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