Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
A large number of population claims that having enough money is a way to make life joyful which is true in variour ways but there are other source available too which leads to make a person happy. My essay aims at discussing more about this statement with my opinion in the end.
On the one hand, the most prominent point is money is precious in this era. To explain more on it, if a person has money then he/she can afford whatever they want. Basically, they will not have to wait for buying a desired thing. Additionally, cash can help a person to do whatever they want which means they cannot only purchase the materialistic goods but they can do anything which is in their Wishlist , for example- unlimited travelling and this can make them feel over the moon.
On the other hand, there are some things which cannot be achieved with money. To be more precise, health is the biggest blessing nowadays and family is the most valuable thing a person can have. These are just some examples of things which cannot be afforded with money but they can be a heavenly blessing in a person's life. Similarly, money can buy things but not good habits or sharp mind. It has been believe that if a person has these precious things they nothing can stop them to fulfill each and every little wish of their life.
In my opinion, although money is essential for comfortable lifestyle in this century, I believe that there are other great factors which can pave a path for happiest life ever.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other factors that lead to fulfillment. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the explanation of how money leads to happiness is limited to purchasing goods and travel, and the discussion on non-monetary factors like health and family is brief. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed examples or deeper analysis of why these factors are significant. The conclusion is a bit abrupt and could have better summarized the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Additionally' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the discussion of money and the discussion of health is a bit abrupt. The use of referencing is generally clear, though some sentences are slightly repetitive in structure, which affects the overall flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using phrases like 'materialistic goods', 'prominent point', and 'pave a path'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'A large number of population' (should be 'A large proportion of the population') and 'variour ways' (spelling error). The phrase 'leads to make a person happy' is also slightly awkward. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensure that your vocabulary is used in a natural, idiomatic way.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'It has been believe' (should be 'It is believed'), 'they nothing can stop them' (missing verb), and 'happiest life ever' (missing article). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor errors, such as the hyphen usage in 'example- unlimited'. The errors do not impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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