Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Few people believe that money is a major way of happiness in life. However, there were numerous other things as well which makes people happy. This essay intends to discuss both the situations by illustrating with relevant points.
To commence with, there are number of arguments in favour that the main way of happiness in life is having a enough money. The reason is that with money, people can buy any items which gives them the satisfactory outcome. To illustrate, If a person has a wish to Dine In in a popular city restaurant, he/she can fulfill their wish with the help of money. Money opens the door for many opprtunities. With money, the social status of a person will be incremented.
On the contrary, there are some other things in life which can amke people happy. To support tthis statement, spending a precious time with loved ones provides happiness to the person. Money can't buy everything like peace, love, and emotions. As per survey 2011, real happiness is the quality time with family which makes the people happy unconditionally. On some occassions, people are not prefering money over peace. As in today's world, peace is very significant as people migrated to other nations or provinces, they have money but money can't buy their loved ones presence.
The arguments outlined above succinctly illustrate thw advantages of money, prove that the moeny is an indispensable part of the world today.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other factors that provide fulfillment. However, the essay is under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of development. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat superficial. For example, the point about 'social status' is mentioned but not fully explored. The conclusion is also quite brief and does not effectively summarize the main points. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your examples and ensure the essay meets the length requirement to allow for a more thorough exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'On the contrary', and 'To illustrate'. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly unnatural. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the lack of sufficient length makes the overall structure feel underdeveloped. Referencing is mostly clear, though the connection between the survey mentioned in the third paragraph and the broader argument could be more smoothly integrated. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a strong topic sentence would enhance the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks range and precision. You use some basic terms repeatedly, such as 'happy' and 'money'. There are also several spelling errors, such as 'opprtunities', 'amke', 'tthis', 'occassions', and 'thw'. While these errors do not significantly impede communication, they indicate a need for more careful proofreading. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and collocations related to the topic of wealth and well-being, and pay closer attention to spelling accuracy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'there were numerous other things' (should be 'are'), 'having a enough money' (article error), and 'people are not prefering' (incorrect tense). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the sentence construction is occasionally awkward, such as 'the main way of happiness in life is having a enough money'. To achieve a higher band, focus on correcting subject-verb agreement and article usage, and aim for more error-free complex sentences.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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