Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Although, its true money can't buy happiness but there is not happiness without money. This topic is a bit controversial. Both parties have strong points in their favour i will articulate their opinions as well as mine in this essay.

Firstly, there are various opinions that states money can make a person happy. Money can get a person good clothes, luxurios cars and big properties which can make a person happy. Wealth plays a devastating role in a persons daily life, they don't have to face poverty. Nowadays debt has become a major reason for depression in our society. People are constantly worried about their credit card payments, their house morgages that has risen the number of depression levels in humans or even lead them towards suicide.

On the other hand, there are some people who thinks happiness can come from different aspects of life money is not only the one option. Spending time family is one of their strong point. In addition grand parent are more happy playing with their grand children. Nothing can beat the happiness of hardworking man seeing his family enjoying their life, playing each other. Moreover health also affects our joy. Health problems have become a major problem in our society. Increasing number of diseases have become a problem for many people. Therefore , health is also playing an important role in happiness.

In my opinion, I think that money is not the only option for happiness, but money is one of them. Money, spending quality time with family and a good health all plays a crucial role in persons happy life. As a result, it depends on persons nature whether he/she wants to be happy in what they have or they are affected by todays materiallistic world

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other factors that influence it. The position is clear throughout, though the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the discussion on debt and depression is relevant but lacks depth. The essay would benefit from more specific examples or a more nuanced exploration of the relationship between wealth and well-being. While the task is addressed, the arguments are somewhat repetitive and rely on generalizations, which limits the score to a 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a basic attempt at using cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', and 'In addition'. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. Some sentences are disjointed, and the use of referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the connection between ideas feels a bit rushed. Overall, the progression is coherent, but the management of cohesive devices lacks the flexibility required for a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks range and precision. There are several spelling errors, such as 'luxurios' and 'materiallistic', and some awkward collocations like 'devastating role' (when referring to wealth) and 'nothing can beat the happiness of hardworking man'. The range is sufficient to convey the message, but the student struggles to use less common lexical items accurately. To improve, the student should focus on learning topic-specific collocations and proofreading for basic spelling errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede readability. Examples include 'its true' (it's), 'there is not happiness', 'opinions that states', and 'grand parent are more happy'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage and sentence fragments. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of grammatical slips prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. More attention to subject-verb agreement and basic sentence construction is needed.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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