Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

There is a believe that one can be happy in his life if he has a lot money with him. A few of the population is favouring this statement. This essay will indicate in what ways the money brings happiness in life and what are the different methods other than money that can make a person happy.

Money is very essential part of our life if the person has money then he can buy a lot of things in his life which can bring comfort and one can become happy. For example if a person has money he can buy amenities which can reduce his effort and that crucial time can be used for something else like to figure out the ways to earn more money. Moreover, money also bring enjoyment with it as one can fulfill his dreams which can be only possible with dreams. To illustrate, if one needs to spend luxury vacation in abroad then it can be really done only with the money otherwise it would be just an imagination.

However, although money is one of the main aspect of happy life but it is not the only way . Health is also very important thing in a person's life as healthy person can find a lot of ways to earn the money but on the other hand if the person has a lot of money he might not be a healthy. If person is not healthy then he could able to enjoy his life. to exemplify if the person is suffering from critical health concern he can not spend his life happily. In spite of this a family is also important in one's life as without the family member one can not remain happy as family is the biggest supporter for any person, it does not matter whether he is rich or poor.

To conclude, although money can fulfill dreams and bring comfort in a person's life but without health and family one can not be happy even though he has a lot of money.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the role of money in happiness and alternative factors like health and family. The ideas are relevant and generally well-supported with examples, such as the mention of luxury vacations and the importance of family support. However, the development is somewhat repetitive, and the position could be more clearly articulated throughout the essay. While the task is fully addressed, the depth of analysis is limited, keeping it at a solid level where the main points are clear but not extensively explored. The structure is logical, and the response maintains a consistent focus on the prompt throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Moreover', 'However', and 'To illustrate', which help guide the reader through the argument. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are instances where the flow between sentences could be smoother. For example, the transition between the discussion of money and the introduction of health could be more sophisticated. Referencing is generally clear, though some minor issues with pronoun usage occasionally make the connection between ideas slightly less fluid. Overall, the progression of ideas is logical and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'amenities', 'luxury', and 'critical health concern'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of awkward phrasing or word choice, such as 'There is a believe' (should be 'belief') and 'A few of the population is favouring'. These errors do not impede communication but indicate a need for more precise control over word forms and collocations to reach a higher band. Expanding the range of synonyms and idiomatic expressions would improve the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the writer attempts complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the money', 'a healthy'), subject-verb agreement ('money also bring'), and modal verbs ('he could able to'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some missing commas and awkward phrasing that affect the overall polish. Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear throughout the text. To improve, the writer should focus on mastering basic sentence construction and reducing repetitive errors in articles and verb forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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