Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
We live in a highly materialistic world where the importance of money is very high. A few people believe that living a happy life is by having the huge amount of money. In this essay, i would mention how having good amount of money make people happy ,along with what other things can assist individuals to live happy in a life.
To begin with, money is one of the most important thing in everyone's life. Firstly, by having a lot of money people can fulfill their materialistic dreams such as, spending money on expensive cars and bikes or going on international trips. In addition, they do not have to think about the price while spending. Secondly, there are a few people who wants to help needy people, by providing any kind of help to them with the money also makes people happy in their life.
However, there are a plethora of other things which makes individuals happy in a life rather than money. For example, having good family and friends because whenever people are in the problems they want someone who can provide emotional support and who can assist them to solve those problems. Apart from that, having good ambition in a life or by doing some social work also makes individuals happy or satisfied in their life.
To conclude, i believe having money helps the individuals to fulfill their materialistic dreams, while to live happy and peacefully in a life people just need the good relation and right state of mind.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and what other factors are important. The ideas are relevant, such as materialistic fulfillment and emotional support from family. However, the development is somewhat superficial. For instance, the point about helping others with money is mentioned but not fully explored. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed explanations or specific examples to support your arguments. The position is clear throughout, but the overall depth of the response is limited, keeping it at a level where ideas are relevant but could be more thoroughly extended.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central topic. You use basic cohesive devices like 'To begin with', 'In addition', and 'However' to guide the reader. While the progression is logical, the use of these devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. Additionally, there are minor issues with referencing, such as 'the huge amount of money' which sounds slightly unnatural in context. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and better referencing to create a more cohesive, natural-sounding text.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, such as 'materialistic', 'plethora', and 'ambition'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'the importance of money is very high' (better: 'the importance of money is significant') and 'live happy in a life' (better: 'live a happy life'). You attempt to use less common vocabulary, but the control is not always precise. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and ensuring that words are used in their correct grammatical form to avoid awkward phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('a few people who wants', 'things which makes') and article usage ('in a life'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma placement. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To progress, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, and try to incorporate more complex sentence structures with greater accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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