Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Earning money is an essential because some people believe that money is the important factor to stay happy in life. I agree to this point and this essay will explain my reasons.

In recent times, costliness is increasing day by day.

If you don’t have enough rupees then you won’t be able to live comfortable life. With enough bank balance, you can buy everything that makes you happy. People comparing their life with others. For example, if your friend has a branded sling bag then you also want to buy such an expensive thing. If you have that much earnings then you can easily afford it and that will make you happy. Additionally, some people love travelling. Travelling to another country costs in lakhs. Without money you cannot complete this dream.

Furthermore, people respect who has high bank balance. More money you earn, more respect you will get. They don’t see your nature or kindness. They will see your way of living. People will consider you on top in the society if you are wealthy.

Although, there are some other factors to live enjoyable life. These factors are family, friends and your limits. Even the richest people need family and friends. Without family you are alone. If you don’t have enough money but you have a supportive environment you can achieve whatever you want. Secondly, you need to know your limits. If your expectations are in your limits, you will feel that you have everything. Do not compare with others. Do not spend on unnecessary things. Save it for your future.

In conclusion, even though there are so many things for a happy life, I think money is the most important factor.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other factors that lead to a fulfilling life. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding social status and respect is a bit repetitive, and the examples provided, such as the 'branded sling bag,' are quite narrow. To achieve a higher band, you should aim to expand on your points with more sophisticated reasoning or broader societal examples rather than focusing on personal material possessions. The conclusion is also quite brief and does not fully synthesize the points made in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. There is a progression of ideas, moving from the benefits of money to alternative sources of happiness. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'Furthermore,' 'Secondly,' 'Additionally'). Some transitions between sentences are abrupt, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'People comparing their life with others,' which lacks a proper verb structure. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the flow of the essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks range and precision. You rely on basic terms like 'important factor,' 'good,' and 'happy.' There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'costliness is increasing' (instead of 'the cost of living is rising') and 'costs in lakhs' (which is culturally specific and less appropriate for an international exam). To improve, try to incorporate more academic or topic-specific vocabulary related to economics and well-being, and work on using words in their correct collocations to sound more natural and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder the reader. Common issues include missing articles ('a comfortable life'), subject-verb agreement ('people respect who has'), and awkward phrasing ('If your expectations are in your limits'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly the use of articles and prepositions, and try to incorporate more varied complex structures with greater accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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