Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent times, some individuals think that it is extremely important to have a significant amount of money because it will make us happy. This essay will not only explain how will a money can make us happy but also describe and discuss the alternative things other than money that can make us happy.

One major reason is money can offer financial stability. These days, individuals often think of their financial stability and work hard to maintain a proper bank balance it offers them to fulfill their desired needs, which ultimately leads to their happiness. Additionally, people usually fell happy when they can afford a sports car or a mansion and money can give you those comforts and allows you to buy the things that you dream for. A good example for this situation is, a difference between a billionaire like Mukesh Ambani who earns in billions can do anything at this fingertips and a regular middle class employee need to think twice before buying a product because it depends upon his financial situation. Consequently, some people assert that money is very essential because it plays a significant role in our life.

I believe that money is not the only thing that makes us happy because there are some emotions which we cannot afford them, mainly love and affection, which would also makes us happy irrespective of our financial situation. Many individuals who live in their hometowns by doing some basic jobs earn sufficient amount and live a beautiful life without any financial pressures and tensions because they are connected with their families and friends. For instance, the individuals who live in foreign countries may earn significantly high wages but they are not happy mentally because they always miss their lived ones especially their parents, which would bother them throughout their life irrespective of their financial situation. As a result, I assert that money is one thing that can make us happy, however there are other things such as care and love which would play a significant role in making us happy.

In conclusion, although this trend is mainly because of the individuals needs, which ultimately drives them to earn them more money and keeps them in that vicious cycle of debt, but I believe that there are some other emotions such as family relationships, that are very essential and play a key role than money in terms of making you happy.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by explaining how money can make people happy and discussing alternative sources of happiness such as love and family relationships. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. The ideas are extended and supported with relevant examples, such as the comparison between a billionaire like Mukesh Ambani and a regular middle-class employee. However, some arguments tend to over-generalise and could be more deeply developed to reach higher bands. Overall, the prompt requirements are fully met, earning a solid Band 7.0 for this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing each part of the prompt, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Additionally', 'Consequently', and 'In conclusion', though there are minor instances where referencing is slightly clunky or mechanical. Despite these minor lapses in cohesion, the overall arrangement is coherent and easy to follow, justifying a Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'financial stability', 'vicious cycle of debt', and 'affection'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward word choices, such as 'will a money can make us happy' and 'fell happy' instead of 'feel happy'. While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. A Band 6.0 is appropriate for this level of lexical control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt at varied grammatical structures. However, there are frequent grammatical and punctuation errors throughout the text, such as tense inconsistencies and awkward phrasing like 'the individuals who live in foreign countries may earn significantly high wages but they are not happy mentally because they always miss their lived ones'. These errors occasionally cause slight strain for the reader, placing the response firmly at a Band 6.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.