Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Now adays mostly people say main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money, how might having a lot of money make people happy ?i am totally disagree with this statement because we cannot buy happiness from money. For example, a person who admit in a hospital and near to die and he has lot of money in their account, but he can't buy to get their health or happiness from money, so that money is source of our lives but not for our permanent happiness. We have to value to our health first of all, if we are good in our health than we should enjoy with money, every knows that health is wealth otherwise money is nothing this is my point of view, so we should have to focus on our healthy life routine rather than how to get more money in our hands. basic requirement of lives is compulsory that why we need money, but excess of money will damage our lives or mental health too. However, some time money plays a role very critical we cannot understand the importance of money, for example for poor community their basic requirement is lot of money their demand more than other because of thirstiness.in my opinion excess of everything is bad. To sum up money is important only for our live not for our unlimited desires, we have to create a balance in money and happiness, secondly satisfied life is much joyful or enjoyable than other relate to have a lot of money as well.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The student addresses both parts of the prompt: how money might make people happy and what other things bring happiness, such as health. There is a clear position stated ('i am totally disagree with this statement because we cannot buy happiness from money'). However, the ideas are somewhat limited and lack full development. The arguments tend to over-generalise and drift slightly, such as the sudden mention of the poor community and their thirst for money. While the prompt is addressed and a basic position is maintained throughout, the lack of depth in exploring the counter-argument about how money brings happiness places this response solidly in the mid-range descriptors. Overall, the task is addressed partially with basic idea extension.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The text demonstrates some organisation, but overall progression is hindered by poor punctuation, run-on sentences, and lack of clear cohesive devices. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal structure of paragraphs lacks logical cohesion. For instance, sentences like 'For example, a person who admit in a hospital and near to die...' are strung together without proper subordination or transitional markers. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as 'that why we need money'. Cohesive devices are either missing or used inaccurately, leading to a mechanical and disjointed feel. While the overall topic remains discernible, the lack of clear logical organisation pulls the score down.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses a limited vocabulary range appropriate for basic communication. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'admit in a hospital' instead of 'admitted to hospital', 'near to die' instead of 'near death', and 'satisfied life' instead of 'fulfilling life'. Words are also repeated frequently, such as 'money', 'happiness', and 'health'. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey basic ideas about wealth and health, noticeable errors and a lack of less common lexical items prevent the response from achieving a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writing exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and faulty attempts at complex clauses. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including tense inconsistencies, missing prepositions, and severe punctuation issues like run-on sentences and comma splices (e.g., 'every knows that health is wealth otherwise money is nothing this is my point of view'). Subject-verb agreement is also problematic, as seen in 'mostly people say' and 'their demand more'. These errors occur with high frequency and occasionally cause difficulty for the reader in parsing the exact meaning, characteristic of Band 4.5 to 5.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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