Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-15
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is often said that having lot of money is the main route of happiness. While financial security can certainly improves the quality of living in several ways, I believe other factor such as relationships and health also plays a crucial role. This essay will examine both.
On the one hand, the money is way to become more happy and secure. A person with a lot of money is financially independent and make bolder decisions. Person can buy, whatever he thinks. With a proper cash flow there is no need to bow down in front of anyone. In Fact, an individual can spend his money in various ways which can make him fell happier then ever. For example, buying new cars, spending money on villas. Even though, making world trips which can make an individual very him satisfied and confident.
On the other hand, there are other things to which makes an individual happy. The major key factor is his family members. Family is the building block of every person, it gives the sense of belongingness. As result, an individual feel safe and emotionally connected with his family. Secondly, the health also plays a crucial role is keeping someone happy and fit, as it states good heath is always better then more wealth. Being health is a blessing it self. For example, a person with good health can enjoy more and could do anything but a person with poor health have to face some barriers and limitations.
In conclusion, although money can make life easier and provide some happiness through security and experiences, I believe it is not the main source of happiness . Relationship and health on the other side has more important.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt by explaining how having a lot of money might make people happy and discussing alternative sources of happiness such as health and relationships. The student maintains a clear position throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive, particularly in the body paragraphs where points are briefly stated without deep extension. For instance, the discussion on money mentions buying cars and villas, but these examples remain superficial. This places the response comfortably at Band 6.0, as it addresses the task adequately with relevant ideas, though some areas are under-developed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into four distinct paragraphs with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, showing an overall logical arrangement. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' are used to structure the text, although some referencing and linking are mechanical or faulty, such as 'As result' and 'on the other side has more important'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different facets of the prompt. While the progression of ideas is generally clear, occasional awkward transitions and referencing errors prevent the response from achieving a higher band, placing it firmly at Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student displays an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common phrases like 'financial security', 'building block', and 'belongingness'. However, there are noticeable word-choice errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, such as 'having lot of money', 'certainly improves', 'make him fell happier then ever', and 'Being health is a blessing it self'. Spelling and morphological inaccuracies, such as 'then' instead of 'than', occur with some frequency. Despite these errors, the meaning is generally communicated, which aligns the lexical performance with the Band 5.5 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some ambition with conditional and relative clauses. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors in articles, subject-verb agreement, and word forms. Examples include 'having lot of money', 'other factor', 'the money is way', 'Person can buy', 'health also plays a crucial role is keeping', and 'Relationship and health on the other side has more important'. These persistent errors cause some difficulty for the reader and show a lack of firm control over complex structures, indicating a Band 5.0 level of grammatical performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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