Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many people say that one way to be happy in life is to have more money. For example, how might having money make people feel happy, and do things in life make people happy? I partially agree with both statements. I elaborate on this in the upcoming paragraphs.

To commence with, many people believe the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. The first and foremost reason is that most people like to buy expensive things to feel relaxed. Because they live in the contemporary era, they feel happy when they buy something new. To elaborate on this, like a new brand related to mobile phones, clothes and so on things. They feel satisfied when they buy something new in their life. For example, According to survey which is conducted by the government in 2024, 75% of population like to felt happly life who are rich than poor people.

Furthermore, there are some other things in life can make the masses happy. Firstly, spending time with their family, In modren era they are busy to earn money no one feel like if they are spend their leisure time with their family also very expensive they share their feelings with each ohers. Because now a days when they are free in their home they spend their leisure time on mobile phone or games instead of spending their time with their family.

Thus, its important for them to spend their free time with their family it is also precious for them. But no one realises yet.

To conclude, No doubt today money is more important for them to live happy in their life but there are ohere things which they need to do in their life to live happily in their whole life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt only partially, fulfilling the requirement of discussing both how money brings happiness and exploring other factors, such as family. However, the development of ideas remains limited and under-developed throughout. For instance, the discussion on materialism focuses heavily on general statements about buying mobile phones and clothes without deeper elaboration. Similarly, the points regarding family relationships lack extension, trailing off into repetitive phrasing instead of exploring the underlying causes. The writer attempts to take a position, but the stance is expressed simply as 'I partially agree' rather than being sustained logically throughout the essay. To move beyond this level, the writer needs to provide fully extended explanations with concrete, well-developed examples that directly address all parts of the prompt with greater depth and clarity.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays some basic organization, including an introduction and distinct paragraphs, but lacks a clear overall progression from beginning to end. While paragraphing is attempted, the internal logic within paragraphs is often disrupted by abrupt shifts in focus, such as moving from consumer surveys directly to family dynamics without a smooth transition. Cohesive devices are used, but they tend to be mechanical or inaccurate, as seen with transitional markers like 'To commence with' and repetitive use of 'To elaborate on this'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, leaving the reader to guess the intended connection between sentences. To achieve a higher standard, the writer must ensure that ideas follow a logical sequence and that cohesive devices are employed naturally and accurately to link sentences and paragraphs seamlessly.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and barely adequate for the task. The writer relies heavily on basic, repetitive terms such as 'happy', 'money', 'things', and 'time'. There are noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and collocation that can cause some difficulty for the reader, such as writing 'fantly life' or 'ohere things' instead of 'family life' and 'other things'. Attempts to use less common lexical items often result in awkward phrases or unnatural expressions, such as 'contemporary era' or 'the masses happy' used inappropriately. To improve this criterion, the writer should expand their vocabulary range by incorporating precise, topic-specific terms and ensuring correct word forms and spellings so that meaning is conveyed with greater clarity and precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences joined by basic conjunctions. When the writer attempts complex sentences, the structures are frequently faulty, leading to grammatical errors in verb forms, tenses, agreements, and prepositions. Examples include 'According to survey which is conducted', 'most people like to felt happly life', and 'no one feel like if they are spend'. Frequent errors in punctuation and clause structure are present throughout the text, causing occasional difficulty and strain for the reader. To progress, the writer needs to practise using a wider variety of complex grammatical structures accurately, paying close attention to verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and the correct formation of subordinate clauses.

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