Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, money plays a pivotal role in everybody's life, and in fact, it is an essential basic need to survive on the Earth. Many believe that money can buy happiness, which improve their lifestyle and overall well-being. Although money can contribute to happiness, having a self-satisfaction, strong relationships and excellent health provides more happiness in contrast to money.

To begin with, a large proportion of money can assists people to enjoy luxurious lifestyle and improves quality of living. People can easily purchase expensive vehicles, furniture, and electronic items, which make their life more convenient and grateful. For instance, a wealthy person acquire everything, which would offer him more comfort, and even though an affluent person feels quite satisfied when he fulfills his all needs and dreams. As a result, money can offer happiness to certain extent.

On the other side, there are various other things, which play a crucial role to make people radiant. To illustrate this, a good relationship, and optimistic health can not bought by money, even we can acquire them by mutual understanding, and high-nutrition food. Many wealthy persons feel lonely because financial stability can not purchase relationship, trust, and overall well-being. Anant Ambani, for instance, a son of multi-millionare Akash Ambani, who builds a strong infrastructure of Reliance company worldwide, his thyroid conditions could not be improved even having a lot of money. Consequently, money can contribute to happiness but it can not guarantee it.

To conclude, although money is quite essential for survival, it is not only way to become the happiest person. Having a outstanding well-being, mutual understanding with family members, and self-satisfaction provide more happiness as compared to the money.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, exploring both how money brings happiness and what alternative factors contribute to well-being. The position is clear throughout the essay, demonstrating a balanced perspective. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others; while the financial aspect is discussed with relevant examples, the exploration of alternative happiness factors relies on slightly repetitive assertions and a confusing specific reference regarding public figures. To reach a higher band, all ideas would need to be equally extended and supported with fully coherent and accurate real-world examples that directly reinforce the central arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear, logical progression of ideas from the introduction through body paragraphs to the conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, separating the financial discussion from the non-financial alternatives. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'On the other side', and 'To conclude' are employed to guide the reader through the text. Nevertheless, referencing and cohesion are occasionally mechanical or slightly faulty, such as the abrupt transitions between sentences in the second body paragraph. Greater flexibility and smoother management of cohesive relationships would elevate the organizational control to the next level.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'pivotal role', 'affluent person', and 'financial stability'. However, there are noticeable word-choice, collocation, and word-form inaccuracies that prevent a higher score, such as 'optimistic health' instead of 'optimal health', 'can not bought' instead of 'cannot be bought', and 'to certain extent'. While these lexical errors do not seriously impede communication, achieving a higher band requires greater precision in word choice and a more natural control of less common collocations and stylistic phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses and conditional structures. There are, however, some errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text, including verb form and subject-verb agreement issues like 'money can assists', articles ('a luxurious lifestyle', 'the money'), and awkward prepositional usage. These errors reflect a typical mix of successful simple structures alongside faulty attempts at complex sentences. The grammar does not impede overall communication, but reaching the next band would require a higher frequency of error-free complex sentences and more consistent control over tense consistency and article use.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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