Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

We are living in the period where material possessions have status symbol. So obviously to buy any luxury items and facilities we need money. Yes, money is important in our life. However if individual is spending whole day in earning money without any quality time, hobbies, free time of himself. Is it going to provide him happiness. Now the answer is no, because without satisfaction in life, one will always feel incomplete. So the balance is significant in our life regarding money and free time.

First of all in order to enjoy comforts, people need to work hard. If we notice our daily routine from awakening morning to night sleeping, we needs basic necessities like food, clothing, shelter, education, comforts for our mental and physical well being. So everything comes with cost and time validity. And its not something like once we paid we do not have to pay it again in future. It is a never ending cycle. So its certain that we need money throughout our life.

On the other hand there are people who have renunciated the comforts and found peace in simple life. They tend to earn less but they believe in giving time to themselves. Many be rich people needs heater, air condition, gym, vitamin supplements for his health but less earning people are already getting this freely from nature by spending time in sunlight, doing house-hold chores by himself, sleeping on terrace or outside of their home for cooling.

In the conclusion money is important but free and quality time spending with friends, family, nature, sunlight and self is also important for every individual.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt by discussing how money brings happiness and exploring alternative sources of fulfillment like free time, nature, and simple living. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack sufficient extension. For instance, the paragraph comparing the lifestyle of a wealthy person using high-tech amenities with a person relying on nature is intriguing, but the argument remains somewhat superficial rather than fully explored. The writer's position is generally clear throughout the text, and relevant examples or observations from general knowledge are provided, even if they would benefit from deeper elaboration to reach a higher level of development.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The text demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a logical progression of ideas from the introduction, through the discussion of money and its alternative, to a clear concluding summary. Paragraphing is utilised to separate the main points adequately. However, cohesion at times feels a bit mechanical or abrupt, such as the transition into the second paragraph using 'First of all' and the somewhat fragmented sentence structures used for rhetorical questioning in the opening section. Referencing and logical connectors between sentences could be managed more smoothly to ensure the flow of information is seamless rather than occasionally disjointed.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common expressions such as 'material possessions', 'status symbol', 'renunciated the comforts', and 'basic necessities'. While communication is clear and the meaning is easily understood, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, form, and collocation, such as 'awakening morning to night sleeping', 'needs basic necessities', and 'less earning people'. These errors do not impede communication, but they reflect a vocabulary control that is characteristic of this level, where less common items are attempted with occasional slips.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The student employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some capability to construct varied sentences like conditional or contrasting thoughts. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, particularly regarding subject-verb agreement ('one will always feel', 'people needs', 'every individual... is'), missing articles ('in period', 'to himself'), and awkward fragment structures used as questions ('Is it going to provide him happiness.'). While these errors do not completely obscure the meaning and the reader can follow the argument, the frequency of grammatical slips places the control of structures within the lower descriptive boundaries.

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