Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many individuals believe that money is the most important thing to live a happy life. They think that they can buy everything to stay happy in their lives. According to me, money is not the only path to stay happy. Family and good health are important factors for us.

There are lots of videos online that claim, " Money can buy every happiness in this world." There are lots of people who are attracted to this statement. But in actual, online life is so fake. People cannot differentiate between real life. They believe that buying new clothes, luxury cars , and expensive food makes them happy. For example, on Instagram, a famous actress "Alia Bhatt" states that her expensive car and luxury life are the two reasons for her happiness.

On the other hand, human physical fitness also plays a key role to stay happy. A healthy body keeps the person energetic, which automatically helps persons to make money. For instance, if an individual works daily to earn, his salary will help him to make money from which he can easily survive happily, The second reason is the family. Having a family is also one of the greatest blessings in a person's life. An individul is also encouraged by his/hef family members. For example, if a girl is living abroad and talking to her mother on a regular basis, this part of the day is the happiness of that girl.

In conclusion, I would say that money is not the only key factor of our life's happiness. Our family and physical strength are also crucial for our lifestyle. People should encourage themselves to stay positive, and this will bring them happiness.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you mention how money can provide material goods, and you identify family and health as other sources of happiness. Your position—that money is not the only route to happiness—is clear in the introduction and conclusion. However, the explanation of how money itself can make people happy is limited: the examples of clothes, cars and expensive food are presented mainly as a claim you disagree with, rather than explaining the security or opportunities money can provide. The health paragraph also shifts to earning money, which does not fully explain health’s direct contribution to happiness. Develop each point with a clearer reason and a relevant example to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. The contrast marker “On the other hand” signals a change from material possessions to health and family, and examples generally follow the points they illustrate. However, the second body paragraph combines two separate ideas without a clear transition: health is followed by earning money, then family. The sentence beginning “The second reason is the family” feels abrupt, and the reference to “this part of the day” could be clearer. Some linking is also mechanical, with repeated “For example” and “There are lots of.” Group health and family into distinct, clearly developed points and use more varied, precise connections.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “luxury cars,” “physical fitness,” “blessings” and “encouraged.” However, the range is limited by repeated general words and phrases such as “happy,” “money,” “people” and “stay happy.” Several expressions are awkward or imprecise, including “In actual,” “online life is so fake,” and “make money from which he can easily survive happily.” These choices sometimes make the intended meaning less clear, particularly when discussing the relationship between health, work and happiness. Aim for more precise collocations and a wider range of terms for wellbeing, financial security and family support. Check spelling and word forms, such as “individual,” as well.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mixture of simple sentences and some longer structures, including relative clauses such as “There are lots of people who are attracted to this statement” and a conditional example beginning “if an individual works daily.” Meaning is generally understandable, but some sentence structures and punctuation are not controlled consistently. For example, “The second reason is the family” is joined to the preceding material without a clear sentence break, and the sentence ending “happily, The second reason…” has incorrect capitalization and punctuation. There are also agreement and article issues in “helps persons” and “Having a family is also one of the greatest blessings.” Review sentence boundaries, articles and singular/plural agreement, and practise building complex sentences accurately rather than joining several ideas with commas.

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