Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In today's generation, we are living in this chaotic world where everyone are surviving in their own lives. In my own perspective, I think it depends on the people. There are some people who are really happy to have a lot of money especially those people who were born as being poor or homeless. They have their own kind of happiness in having those money.

On the other hand, there are also some people who are not really happy to have a lot of money because they were born being rich. I believe they are not craving for money anymore, instead they crave for peace and genuine happiness. They bought everything they need and want. Based on my observations, the rich people are not really happy.

Overall, money is very necessary especially in times of difficulties and emergencies in life. And as we live in this generation everything are expensive and having those money can really make us happy to provide everything we need.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address both questions in a basic way: you suggest that money can help people who have experienced poverty, and you mention peace and genuine happiness as alternatives. However, the response only partially answers the task. The explanation of how money creates happiness remains general, and the second question is not developed with clear examples of other sources of happiness. The claim that rich people are “not really happy” is also broad and unsupported. In addition, the response is 164 words, below the required 250, so there is not enough development to explain your reasons fully. To strengthen the response, explain specific benefits of money, such as security or access to healthcare, and develop other sources of happiness with relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

Your response has a recognisable structure: the opening introduces your view, “On the other hand” signals a contrast, and “Overall” introduces a concluding point. These markers help the reader follow the basic direction of your ideas. However, the progression is limited, and the contrast between people who are poor and people who are rich is repeated rather than developed into a fuller argument. The final paragraph mainly restates that money is necessary, without bringing together the two parts of the question. Some connections are also unclear, such as how being born rich necessarily means someone no longer values money. Use separate, purposeful paragraphs for each question and connect each claim to an explanation or example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a small range of relevant vocabulary, including “difficulties,” “emergencies,” “peace,” and “genuine happiness,” which makes your main topic clear. There are also attempts to express different perspectives through phrases such as “On the other hand.” However, vocabulary is repetitive, especially “happy,” “money,” and “people,” and several expressions are awkward or imprecise, including “having those money” and “craving for money.” This limits the clarity and naturalness of the response. Build a wider set of topic-specific terms, such as financial security, basic needs, relationships, and personal fulfilment, and check that phrases are used in natural combinations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use mostly simple sentence patterns, with some attempts to join ideas using clauses, as in “There are some people who are really happy…” This allows the reader to understand the general message, but the range of structures is limited and errors occur frequently. For example, “everyone are surviving” has subject–verb disagreement, while “everything are expensive” repeats this problem. In “They bought everything they need and want,” the tense shifts awkwardly from the surrounding present-tense discussion. The sentence beginning “In my own perspective, I think…” also combines two similar framing structures. Practise accurate agreement, consistent tense, and a wider range of sentence forms, then proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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