Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

While few individuals beleives that the best method to be cheerful in life is to have possession of finance, others argue that happy life is a result of other factors.This essay will articulate both the perspectives and i agree with latter notion.

Commence with the reasons why people are becoming elated without financially strengh, the predominant is family support. To explain, these days most of the people are supported by their family while they are struggling with arduous situations. As a result, it gives not only emotional strength, but also provides financial assistence.Moreover, physical and mental well being are also considered for the cheerful lifstyle of individual.In detail,The capability of performing their task independently either at education or workplace aids to stay confident and motivated to acheive desired targets. Hence,in this way they get inner gratification which is most precious thing in today's world.

However, a large proportion of population who have enough money are financially able to buy anything whichever they want. To elaborate, Technological gadget makes their life convenient and comfortable. Consequently, It aids to enjoy lavish life style .Furthermore, some individuals are bought several type of branded product in order to show their financial status in front of others.Therfore, it contributes to reputation of the individual and provides innner complacency.

Although, possession of funds are vital to survive in this contemporary era, real happiness can come by spending time with family and well being.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: family support, wellbeing and personal achievement are offered as sources of happiness, while money is linked to convenience, luxury goods and status. Your final sentence also makes your position clear in favour of non-financial sources. However, the response is under the required 250 words, and this limits how fully you can explain and support the ideas. Several points remain general: for example, you say family provides emotional and financial support but give no specific illustration, and the discussion of gadgets and branded products does not explain how these purchases create lasting happiness. Develop each side with a clearer reason and a relevant example, and make the comparison between money and other sources more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on non-financial sources, a paragraph on money, and a concluding view. Linking expressions such as “To explain,” “As a result,” and “However” help signal relationships between ideas. At times, though, the progression feels mechanical, and some connections are unclear. For instance, “Commence with the reasons” is an awkward transition, while “Although” at the start of the conclusion does not connect smoothly to the preceding paragraph. The long second paragraph also combines family support, wellbeing and achievement without clearly separating these points. Use simpler, more natural transitions and organise each paragraph around one main idea, with explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary, including “arduous situations,” “inner gratification,” “financial status” and “contemporary era,” which shows an effort to express ideas beyond basic terms. However, a number of choices are inaccurate or unnatural and sometimes make the meaning less clear, such as “financially strengh,” “financial assistence,” “cheerful lifstyle,” and “innner complacency.” Some phrases also do not fit their context: “people are bought several type of branded product” appears to mean that people buy branded products. Focus on accurate, natural collocations rather than using formal-sounding words where a simpler expression is clearer. Careful proofreading for spelling and word forms would also improve control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and attempts at complex structures, including “while they are struggling with arduous situations” and “Although possession of funds are vital to survive…”. This gives the response some variety, but errors in sentence construction and agreement are noticeable. For example, “While few individuals beleives…” has an incorrect verb form, and “possession of funds are vital” has a subject–verb agreement problem. Several sentences also run together or have inconsistent punctuation, as in “Moreover, physical and mental well being are also considered for the cheerful lifstyle of individual.In detail,The capability…”. Use complete, clearly punctuated sentences, check singular and plural agreement, and practise complex clauses so that their structure remains accurate.

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