Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people say that money is most important in life.Therefore I think money is crucial but relationships is most important.

Firstly,Money is most crucial in all people. Because they want to buy any thing they can buy this. They can go everywhere easily. Other luxury are available to mostly people then they pass life very pleasure. Some people complete wishes to their family and himself. They buy branded clothes, vehicles, and also make impressive house. They can do everything easily every time. Some people think personality make with money. But all thing can not complete with money.

Secondly, cash is useful but relationships is most important. When they live happy with family members. They pass their time easily. Individuals buy everything with money but they can't buy relatives with money. When people stay with family, friends, and sister, brother then they could happy in their life. Money can gave something but it can't gave relatives.some people think when earn more money. They buy everything. They save their amount to bank account. They are just focus on money they don't give importance to family. But family members is soo crucial.In the village, people give importance to family. They spend a lot of time with relatives.

Finally, money and relatives both are important in their life. They earn money and spend a lot of time with family. They should go everywhere with family and spend money on family. They stay happy life with family. They should complete family wishes with money. People should also care to family happiness.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both questions: the first body paragraph explains that money enables people to buy goods, travel, and fulfil family wishes, while the second identifies family and friends as sources of happiness that money cannot purchase. Your concluding view—that both money and relationships matter—is also present. However, the position shifts from “relationships is most important” to saying both are important, and several points remain general or repetitive. For example, “They can do everything easily” does not explain specifically how wealth contributes to lasting happiness, and the village example is asserted without showing why it supports your view. Develop fewer ideas with clearer explanations or a relevant example, and keep your position consistent throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “Firstly” and “Secondly,” and a concluding paragraph beginning “Finally.” This helps readers identify the two main sides of your answer. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the first paragraph moves from buying things to personality and then to the limits of money without explaining the connections. Linking words are also used mechanically, and some references are vague, such as “this” in “they can buy this.” Repeated statements about buying everything and spending time with family make the argument feel circular. Group related points together, use clear references, and explain how each example supports the paragraph’s main idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a basic range of relevant vocabulary, including “relationships,” “luxury,” “branded clothes,” “relatives,” and “family wishes,” so the main topic is generally understandable. However, vocabulary is repetitive and several word combinations are unnatural or imprecise, such as “pass life very pleasure,” “complete wishes,” and “personality make with money.” Repeated use of “important,” “money,” and “family” also limits variety. Choose more precise expressions for the benefits of wealth and the value of relationships, and check whether words naturally combine in English. For example, describe people as fulfilling their family’s wishes or enjoying a comfortable lifestyle rather than using the current phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

Most sentences use simple patterns, and you attempt some longer structures with “because,” “when,” and “but.” However, these attempts are often faulty, and frequent errors sometimes make the reader pause. Examples include the agreement error in “relationships is most important,” the incorrect verb form in “Money can gave,” and the incomplete construction “Because they want to buy any thing they can buy this.” Articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries also need attention; for instance, “all thing” and “relatives.some” are not correctly formed or punctuated. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, then check agreement and punctuation. Add more accurate complex sentences gradually rather than joining several ideas loosely.

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