Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Money is only a tool.It will not get you happiness unless you know how to use it.

Well,wealth contributes significantly to fullfiling needs and having freedom.I believe that true happiness stems equally from non-material aspects of life such as meaningfull relationships.

On one hand,having alot of money make your future secure and comfort.You have a sense of freedom to buy anything you like,you can travel to any place where you wish to go.You can rest, skip work and stay home all day relaxed without tension of work, or without fear of any call from the boss to work.You are the boss yourself.

On the other hand,having alot of money does not gurrentee long term happiness, as you might die the next day or maybe someone close to you gets certain disease thats not curable,how having a alot of money will save you now?So basically, there are certain situations where having a alot of money is of no use.May be you loose your account details or someone scmas you and take your all money.

Certainly,there are alot more things other than money that can make people happy;for instance,having good friends in life;who support you whenever you are in need,who are there for you in any uphill battle.Having a good health is another kind of happiness and a blessing that money can not buy.Having a supportive partner in your life;makes you feel at the top of the world.Getting your hardwork paid off is another kind of happiness that money can not buy.

So basically, having alot of money nevertheless make you happy but it does not promises to give a forever happy life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both parts of the question and maintain a clear overall view: money can provide security, freedom and comfort, but happiness also comes from relationships, health and personal achievement. The examples of travelling, taking time away from work, supportive friends and a partner make the response relevant. This meets the task well, and the opening idea that money is a tool gives your position a clear starting point. However, some points are asserted rather than explained: for example, the possibility of illness or being scammed is mentioned without showing in detail how these situations affect happiness. The final claim that money can make you happy but cannot promise lasting happiness could also be reconciled more clearly with your opening position. Further development and a more precise conclusion would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, contrasting paragraphs about money and non-material sources of happiness, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “On one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal the main contrast, and the examples generally follow the point they illustrate. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, with repeated transitions such as “So basically” and repeated use of “having a lot of money.” Some sentences also contain several ideas joined by commas, making the progression harder to follow—for example, the sentence about illness and money. Paragraphing is appropriate, but clearer links between individual examples and the central argument, along with more varied referencing and transitions, would make the organisation smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary for the topic, including “sense of freedom,” “long term happiness,” “supportive partner” and “uphill battle.” These choices help communicate ideas about security and relationships. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “fullfiling,” “meaningfull,” “gurrentee,” “loose” and “scmas.” Some expressions are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “make your future secure and comfort,” “take your all money” and “getting your hardwork paid off.” These do not prevent the reader from understanding the main message, but they reduce precision and fluency. Aim to check spelling carefully and learn common collocations, such as “provide financial security” and “earn recognition for your hard work.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional idea in “unless you know how to use it” and a contrast introduced by “as.” The main meaning is usually clear, but some errors in sentence structure, agreement and punctuation remain. For example, “having a lot of money make your future secure” needs subject–verb agreement, while “having a supportive partner in your life; makes you feel” incorrectly separates the subject from its verb. Several sentences are joined with commas where a full stop or conjunction would be clearer, particularly the sentence beginning “On the other hand.” Missing spaces after full stops and commas also affect punctuation. Review agreement with gerund subjects and practise punctuating longer sentences accurately.

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