Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Yes, some persons can say that the best way to be happy in life is having plenty money. but, money is not all in life, one can have money but lack happiness, because having money can bring alot of trouble to some person, if its not from good source or poor handling which may bring a lot of confusion.

Therefore, some people that are well to do or who claims to have a lot of money may appear to be happy but deep down they are really happy because the money and other things around them contribute to their happiness. There are other things that can make people happy like having good children, house, better opportunity to travel to anywhere the like in the world, and proper education in different fields of like.

Furthermore, I can say that it's not only money that make people happy, when one is at peace with oneself and the things around in the society without struggling to get the basics things in life, can actually be recorded as a happy citizen.

In our world today many who are rich extend helping hands to the poor who can't afford daily break in my country, some build houses for the least privilege and care for their children education out of the abundance nature and hard work have given to them.

Moreso, In conclusion money is what makes the world good to be lived, without money it will be very difficult to manage and get the basic things that makes like sweet, that is why its said that having plenty money makes people happy with reasons behind the needs and wants in life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you explain that money can provide basic necessities and enable wealthy people to help others, and you mention family, education, travel and peace of mind as other sources of happiness. However, these ideas are mostly listed or asserted rather than explained with clear examples. For instance, the point about helping poor people could show how this benefits both the giver and recipient, while the benefits of education or family life need further development. Your position is also not fully consistent: you begin by saying money is not everything, but conclude that having plenty of money makes people happy. Clarifying how money contributes to happiness without guaranteeing it would make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has some paragraphing and a recognisable sequence: it introduces the issue, gives other sources of happiness, adds a point about social peace, and ends with a conclusion. However, the overall progression is not always clear, and several ideas are joined in long sentences, making their relationships difficult to follow. Connectors such as “Therefore,” “Furthermore,” and “Moreso” are used, but they do not always show a precise logical link; the paragraph beginning “Therefore” shifts from money to other sources of happiness. The conclusion also repeats the importance of money rather than clearly bringing together both parts of the discussion. Organise the body into distinct points and use clearer links between each claim and its explanation.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of relevant vocabulary, including “at peace with oneself,” “daily” needs, “abundance,” and “opportunity to travel,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or awkward, which limits precision. Examples include “plenty money,” “daily break” where you appear to mean daily bread or food, and “the least privilege” instead of a phrase such as “the least privileged.” “Proper education in different fields of like” also makes the intended meaning unclear. Some expressions, such as “well to do,” are relevant but need more natural phrasing and consistent spelling. Aim to learn common word partnerships and check that each phrase expresses the intended idea.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including clauses with “because” and “when,” but complex sentences are often difficult to control. For example, “when one is at peace with oneself … can actually be recorded as a happy citizen” lacks a clear main-clause subject, and “some people … who claims” has a subject–verb agreement error. There are also recurring problems with articles, plurals and verb forms, as in “the basics things” and “money … make people happy.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation need attention too: the opening “but” follows a full stop, and several long sentences contain multiple ideas without clear separation. Build accuracy with shorter sentences first, then combine ideas using controlled subordinate clauses.

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