Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Yes most of the people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money however this is very subjective and depends on mindset of a person.

Firstly, for most of our things and to lead a better Life style money is crusial. To carry on day to day life we need money like groceries, utilities, clothes, health care etc. A financial ability of a person decides what type of living standard they are having. Some people are happy in earning less and making lives accordingly and on the other hand some people believe having more the better the things will in their life. People with the mindset of making more money gives priority to financial status. This is a fact that who are eager to make more are actually doing really well in their career and maintaining a quality living.

Secondly, a very fewer people believe that we should give importance to other aspects of life and other things like relationship, freinds and family are equally important. they believe no matter how much money you make but if you dont have people and relationships in your life with whom you'll enjoy your life and money with. love and care is something humans crave for. For instance if someone is hospitalized obviously money would needed to carry on the treatment but care and love would be equally important.

conclusion, keeping money as the main priority of life and stay focused to make better living standard, upgrade in life however giving a little less but importance to other aspects of your life is equally significant because once you are at the peak of your career, financially stable still we need people and relationships in our life to celebrate or sucess and happiness with them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the question: it explains that money pays for necessities and can support a higher standard of living, then identifies family, friends, love and care as other sources of happiness. Your position—that money matters but is not sufficient on its own—is clear, especially in the conclusion. The hospital example is relevant and helps show why emotional support matters alongside financial resources. However, the explanation of how wealth itself creates happiness is less fully developed: the discussion of career success and “quality living” is broad and would benefit from a specific example or clearer link to wellbeing. Some ideas, such as the contrast between people who earn less and those who seek more, are also difficult to follow.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure, moving from an introduction to money, then relationships, and finally a conclusion. “Firstly” and “Secondly” help signal the two main areas, and the hospital example is placed with the point it supports. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the first body paragraph shifts from necessities to personal attitudes and then career success without explaining the links between these points. Some connections are mechanical or imprecise, such as “on the other hand” and “conclusion,” while the final sentence combines several ideas without clear separation. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main claim, and connect examples directly to that claim.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “financial status,” “living standard,” “relationships,” and “financially stable,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at less common phrasing, such as “humans crave for” and “at the peak of your career,” though some combinations are inaccurate or unnatural. Spelling and word-choice errors—including “crusial,” “freinds,” “sucess,” and “a very fewer people”—reduce precision and make the writing less fluent. Some wording is also vague, for example “making lives accordingly” and “doing really well.” Aim for accurate collocations and more specific terms to explain what money enables, such as security, access to healthcare, or leisure.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a contrast with “however” and a conditional example beginning “if someone is hospitalized.” These attempts show some range, but errors in sentence construction and punctuation are frequent enough to affect clarity. For example, “Yes most of the people say…” needs clearer punctuation, and “if you dont have people and relationships… with whom you'll enjoy your life and money with” is an incomplete, awkwardly structured clause. There are also errors with articles and agreement, as in “money would needed,” and the conclusion’s opening “conclusion” lacks a complete introductory structure. Practise building shorter, complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses with accurate verb forms and punctuation.

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