Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-11-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I recently visited your one of the branch which is located at 41st Avenue, East Vancouver nearby to famous cafeteria called "The Tulips". I bought a white snow jacket which is worth of 250$ from same branch around 6:00 pm on 5th November, 2026. I am writing this letter to bring your little attention on returning policies of the merchandises.

I observed some discoloration at the inner side of jacket, when I headed to home. Also, the furs on the cap started falling off right in the bag itself. So, I went back to the store around 8:00 PM to return or exchange the jacket. As, I struggled very hard while returning my jacket, although it just bagged up in my closet now; and totally of no use. At store, the authorised person stated me that, the products above 300$ are only exchanged or returned and the issues with furs or colors were considered as minor defects. Thereby, the purchased merchandise is neither refundable nor exchanged.

I would like to convey a solely disappointment from your store and policies as well. If I would know before, I would never visited. I believe, your policy is against the rules of Consumer Policy, so I would definitely take serious action on this, if my jacket was not replaced or not refunded. Please, take this into consideration. Hoping for quick reply.

Thank you.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address all three required points and maintain a clear complaint throughout. The jacket’s defects are specific—discoloration inside and fur falling from the hood—and you explain that the store refused a return or exchange because of its price threshold and its view that the defects were minor. You also make your desired outcome clear by asking for replacement or a refund, and the details about the purchase help establish the situation. To strengthen the response further, develop the requested remedy more directly and professionally: specify whether you prefer a refund or replacement, and state what action you expect the manager to take. The warning about taking “serious action” is clear but could be supported with a more measured explanation of why the policy seems unfair.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter follows a sensible overall sequence: purchase and purpose, discovery of the damage and attempted return, then your complaint and requested resolution. Paragraphing helps distinguish these stages, and time references such as “around 6:00 pm” and “around 8:00 PM” make the events easy to follow. Some linking is already effective, but a few connections are awkward or unclear, particularly “As, I struggled very hard while returning my jacket, although…” and “Thereby, the purchased merchandise…”. These make the progression less smooth than it could be. Use simpler links such as “However” to introduce the refusal, and separate the closet detail from the return attempt so each sentence has one clear purpose.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range for a formal complaint, including relevant terms such as “discoloration,” “authorised person,” “minor defects,” and “refunded.” These choices communicate the main issue, and the specific product and defect vocabulary makes the letter informative. However, several phrases show inaccurate word choice or collocation, including “bring your little attention,” “worth of 250$,” “bagged up in my closet,” and “convey a solely disappointment.” Some expressions also sound more confrontational or less natural than needed for a business letter. Aim for precise, conventional complaint language, such as “draw your attention to,” “cost $250,” and “express my disappointment.” This would make your meaning more fluent and appropriately formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “when,” “although,” and “if,” and the main events remain understandable. However, some grammatical errors affect clarity and control. For example, “I recently visited your one of the branch” has an incorrect determiner pattern, while “If I would know before, I would never visited” uses an inaccurate conditional structure and verb form. The sentence beginning “As, I struggled…” is also difficult to follow because its clauses are not joined correctly. Review articles and word order, and use “If I had known earlier, I would not have bought it” for a past unreal condition. Breaking long, tangled sentences into shorter ones will improve accuracy while retaining variety.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.