Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter to express my disappointment that, I had with the store manager while I'm returning my jacket.

I purchased a black jacket from Allen solly last Friday, as it was night I was hurry and unable to check properly at store. As soon as I reached home next day morning, I noticed a tear inside the jacket and zipper was not properly fitting.

When I tried to return back the item at store, the store manager was behaving in a odd way and not accepting the jacket. Although jacket was tampered at showroom instead he was blaming me. The customer support was not good and asking me to visit on Wednesday and Thursday, since it was the only window were we can exchange the items. However, there was no return.

I would like manager to speak properly with customers first and explain the things in a proper way, also display same things at counter.

Yours sincerely,

Shiva.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

You have successfully addressed all three bullet points required in the task instructions. You described the problem with the jacket ("a tear inside the jacket and zipper was not properly fitting"), explained what happened when you tried to return it, and stated what you would like the manager to do. The tone is appropriate for a formal complaint letter to a store manager. However, some parts of your narrative are slightly confusing or under-developed, particularly regarding the conflicting information given about the exchange windows and the accusation that the jacket was tampered with at the showroom. Despite these minor lapses in clarity, all requirements of the prompt are covered, aligning well with a Band 6.0 performance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

Your letter has an overall coherent arrangement, beginning with the correct standard greeting and closing appropriately. You use basic paragraphing to separate your introduction, the description of the problem, the store visit, and your desired resolution. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty. For instance, the transition "as it was night I was hurry" is awkward, and the sentence "Although jacket was tampered at showroom instead he was blaming me" lacks clear logical connection and cohesive referencing. Furthermore, the progression of ideas in the third paragraph feels slightly disjointed. These issues place your coherence and cohesion in the Band 5.5 to 6.0 range, where referencing is not always clear and cohesive devices are occasionally inaccurate.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully using functional phrases such as "express my disappointment," "merchandise," and "customer support." However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors throughout the response, such as writing "I was hurry" instead of "I was in a hurry," and stating that the zipper was "not properly fitting" rather than "broken" or "faulty." You also use the phrase "return back," which is redundant. While your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your message, these frequent slips in word choice and phrasing prevent you from achieving a higher band, making Band 5.5 the most suitable score for this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as "As soon as I reached home next day morning, I noticed a tear..." and "When I tried to return back the item..." However, your writing contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation oversights. There are missing articles ("at store" instead of "at the store", "manager" instead of "the manager"), incorrect preposition usage, and comma splices in your opening sentence ("...disappointment that, I had..."). Tense consistency is also an issue, switching between past and present unnecessarily ("while I'm returning"). These errors frequently cause strain for the reader, placing your grammar control firmly at Band 5.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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