Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear sir,

I am writing to express my dissatisfation with a jacket that I recently bought from your store and one of your coleagues refused to return it.

I bought a black leather jacket from your store, when I reached at home I saw the jip has broken and not work properly. Also the side pocket of jacket tear from inside.

When I tried to return it to you store, The service representative refused to return it and told me they they do not return anything once they sell to the customer. But when I bought this jacket no one explain me the return policy and as usual customer have rights to return anything in 30 days of purchase date.

I would greatly appreciate if y

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the main problem—a broken zip and a torn pocket—and explain that a staff member refused the return, so the letter is relevant to the situation. However, the response addresses the task only partially: the requested action for the manager is not completed, ending instead with “I would greatly appreciate if y”. The claim about customers’ rights is also not explained or supported, and the circumstances of the purchase and return remain brief. The response is 24 words below the required minimum, which contributes to the limited development. Complete the request clearly, for example by asking for a replacement or refund, and add relevant details about when you bought and returned the jacket.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a generally understandable order: it introduces the complaint, describes the damage, and then recounts the attempted return. Paragraph breaks help distinguish these points, and “When I tried to return it” signals the next stage clearly. However, the progression is weakened by the unfinished final sentence, which leaves the purpose of the letter unresolved. Some connections are also awkward or unclear, such as joining the purchase and discovery with a comma in “I bought a black leather jacket from your store, when I reached at home…”. The repeated “return” and “jacket” make the message less smooth. Use complete paragraphs and link events with clear time markers, then finish with a direct request and an appropriate closing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough relevant vocabulary to communicate the complaint, including “black leather jacket”, “side pocket”, “service representative” and “return policy”. These terms make the situation identifiable. However, the range is limited, and several noticeable spelling or word-choice errors may slow the reader: “dissatisfation”, “coleagues”, “jip” and “tear from inside”. Some phrases are also imprecise, such as “return anything once they sell to the customer”. Choose accurate terms such as “zipper”, “torn lining” and “refund”, and check spelling carefully. More precise complaint language would help you explain the damage and the remedy without relying repeatedly on “return” and “jacket”.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response uses mostly simple sentence patterns, with an attempt at a longer sentence to explain the return refusal. However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make the message difficult to follow. For example, “when I reached at home” has an incorrect preposition pattern, while “no one explain me” lacks the appropriate verb form and object construction. In “they they do not return”, the repeated subject is distracting, and “I would greatly appreciate if…” is incomplete and needs a subject clause such as “it if you could…”. The comma splice in “I bought…, when I reached…” also needs correction. Practise accurate past-tense forms and complete sentence structures, while adding a few controlled complex sentences.

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