Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

dear manager

I'm writing regarding the jacket i bought from your store yesterday, when i got home and i noticed that the jacket was damaged , when i returned it your sale representative refused to collect the jacket back, saying the store doesnt accept return items

yesterday exactly around 10:30 am, i came to your store to get a jacket, because a friend referred me to your store that you people sales quality items, and i bought it very expensive too, i didn't test it at your store because I was in a hurry to meet up an appointment, so when i got home i tested the jacket, unfortunately it got damaged at the down side, i felt very sad when i noticed that, i hurrly return back to your store to complain, surprisingly I'm getting unfavorable answers from your sales representative that your store doesn't accept return items , I'm pleading that i should use your good office to considered me as a new customer and give an order that new jacket should be given to we without delay.

Yours faithful

Howell Howell

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three required points: you describe damage “at the down side,” explain that the sales representative refused the return, and request a replacement jacket. The request is clear, so the reader understands the outcome you want. The account of the damage and the refusal is relevant, but some details are less fully explained: for example, you do not say exactly what was damaged or whether the jacket was unworn when you brought it back. The opening and closing also do not fully follow the requested formal letter style. To strengthen the response, describe the defect more precisely, state the remedy clearly and politely, and use a consistent formal greeting and sign-off.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The events are presented in a broadly understandable order: you bought the jacket, discovered the damage, and returned to the store. However, the letter is largely one long paragraph, and the opening repeats information that is explained again in the main account. This limits the sense of progression and makes the reader work to separate the problem, the store’s response, and your request. Some links, such as “so” and “surprisingly,” help show relationships, but the sequence of details is not always smooth. Use separate paragraphs for the purchase and defect, the attempted return, and the requested action. Clearer sentence boundaries and fewer repeated details would make the letter easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough relevant vocabulary to communicate the main issue, including “damaged,” “refused,” “sales representative,” and “return items.” However, the range is limited and several choices or forms are unnatural for a formal complaint. “Collect the jacket back” and “give an order that new jacket should be given to we” make the request less clear and polished; “down side” is also imprecise. Spelling and word-form errors such as “hurrly” and “doesnt” are noticeable. Aim for precise clothing and customer-service language, and check spelling and collocations. For example, describe the specific defect and ask the manager to “arrange a replacement” or “issue a refund.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the reader can generally understand the sequence of events. However, complex sentences are often joined with commas, as in “I'm writing regarding the jacket i bought … yesterday, when i got home,” creating run-on structures. There are also errors in articles, agreement, and pronouns: “a new jacket should be given to we” should use “me,” and “your store … sales quality items” needs a correctly formed clause. Capitalisation of “I” and sentence punctuation are inconsistent. Build accuracy by separating the long account into shorter sentences, checking subject–verb agreement and pronoun forms, and using a few controlled subordinate clauses rather than joining several ideas with commas.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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