Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Dear Sir,

I am writing to express my concern about a jacket which i bought last week. Un-fortunatly i found it is a damaged piece when i get back to home. I saw a small hole at the back of shoulder.

After realising the problem with jacket i went to the store to return it. i have been told that there is no return policy in our business. Firstly,I was stunning to face situation that you do not have any

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify the central problem—a small hole at the back of the shoulder—and explain that the store refused a return because it has a no-return policy. However, the response addresses the task only partially: it ends before explaining what you want the manager to do, such as provide a refund or replacement, and the circumstances of the purchase and return are not developed. The letter is also substantially below the required minimum of 150 words, which leaves the requested points incomplete. To improve, finish the letter and clearly state a reasonable outcome, then add relevant details about when you bought the jacket, what staff said, and why you expect the store to resolve the issue.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The ideas follow a basic, sensible order: you introduce the purchase, describe the damage, and then explain your visit to the store. This gives the reader a general sense of the situation. However, the response stops mid-sentence at “you do not have any,” so there is no complete ending or clear progression to a request. The linking is also limited, with “After realising” and “Firstly” doing most of the work; “Firstly” is not followed by a corresponding next point. Use separate paragraphs for the problem, the return attempt, and your requested solution, and connect them with clear transitions so the letter feels complete.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for a complaint, including “express my concern,” “damaged,” “small hole,” and “return policy,” so the main issue is understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, which makes parts of the letter less natural: “a damaged piece” and “stunning to face situation” do not express the intended meaning clearly. Spelling and capitalization also need attention, as in “Un-fortunatly” and lowercase “i.” Aim for precise, conventional complaint-letter phrases, such as “the jacket was defective” and “I was surprised to be told,” and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response communicates its basic meaning through mostly simple sentence patterns, for example, “I saw a small hole at the back of shoulder.” There is an attempt to use a longer time clause in “when i get back to home,” but the verb form and sentence construction are not controlled. Other errors include missing articles in “with jacket” and “at the back of shoulder,” inconsistent capitalization of “i,” and punctuation problems around “Firstly,I.” The final sentence is incomplete, which also affects clarity. Practise accurate past-tense reporting for completed events (“when I got home”) and build complete sentences with correct articles and punctuation before attempting more complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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