Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir/ Madam

I am writing this letter to inform you about the jacket that I bought from your store it was not good and I called to your store and he says jacket can't be returned once purchased.

Firstly, I would like to tell you about jacket it is red in colour and is ripped from backside and also had stain spots on it. Moreover, when I tried to return the jacket one of your representative says that you guys have no return policy so I asked him for exchange the product but he refuses to do it as well.

Secondly, I also say them to call you but you were not at the store. I would really appreciate it if you can do something to resolve this issue I will really feel happy if you can exchange or return my money back.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

Ayush

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three required points: the jacket is described as red, ripped at the back and stained; you explain that a staff member refused both a return and an exchange; and you ask the manager to resolve the matter. The request for either an exchange or a refund is clear, and the letter’s purpose is apparent throughout. This meets the task well, though some details are only briefly stated. For example, “I called to your store” is unclear about whether you called or visited, while the prompt’s return attempt could be described more precisely. To strengthen the response further, explain when or how you bought the jacket and state a specific preferred remedy, while keeping the alternative as a fallback.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a recognisable structure, moving from the reason for writing to the jacket’s condition, the unsuccessful return attempt and a closing request. Paragraph breaks help separate these points, and the final sentence is an appropriate sign-off. However, the progression is sometimes mechanical: “Firstly” and “Secondly” do not clearly signal the relationship between the details, and the second paragraph combines the staff’s refusal with your request to contact the manager. The opening sentence also joins several ideas without clear punctuation, making the sequence harder to follow. Use clearer sentence boundaries and organise the body into distinct paragraphs for the damage, the return attempt and the requested solution. This would make the overall progression smoother and references easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough relevant vocabulary to communicate the main problem, including “ripped,” “stain spots,” “return policy,” “exchange” and “resolve this issue.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are imprecise or informal for a complaint to a manager. “You guys” is too casual, “stain spots” is an awkward collocation, and “return my money back” is redundant. “Not good” also gives little detail about the jacket’s condition. Choose more precise complaint language and vary the wording for the damage and the remedy. For instance, describe the jacket as “damaged” or “defective,” and refer to “a refund” rather than “my money back.” These changes would make the letter more natural and appropriately formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response communicates its main message, but grammatical control is uneven, and the sentence patterns are mostly simple or joined with basic connectors. The opening sentence runs several clauses together: “I bought from your store it was not good and I called to your store,” so the relationships between ideas are unclear. There are also errors in articles and sentence construction, as in “tell you about jacket” and “asked him for exchange the product.” The past-tense account shifts awkwardly in “I also say them,” and the request “if you can” would be more appropriately framed with “could.” Practise separating clauses with full stops and using accurate article and verb forms. A few well-controlled complex sentences would add range without sacrificing clarity.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.