Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Dear store manager,

I am writing this letter to express my disappointment regarding an purchase of damage jacket from your store yestraday.

Firstly, I came on 18th of october to purchase an leather jacket and I was impress about your collection of several kind of jacket. So, I decided to buy 2 jacket for my friend also, which has good discount price for buying 2 items but when I went home and I found out an stain on the back side and the pocket were tear, I was stunned why it like that and your store has sell me this damage piece without checking. It was so frustrating for me.

Secondly, When I came to returned this damage item, they told me that merchandise cannot be returned but the problem was from the damage product not from my side and I explanied to them everything and try to get my refund but

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the damaged jacket, describing a stain and a torn pocket, and explain that staff refused a return because merchandise could not be returned. However, the letter is incomplete: it ends with “but” and does not say what you want the manager to do, so one required point is missing and the outcome of the return attempt is unclear. The opening also says you bought a “damage jacket” but does not clearly establish which item was damaged, especially after mentioning two jackets. To strengthen the response, complete the account and make a direct request, such as a refund or replacement, with a brief reason. Use the requested salutation, “Dear Sir or Madam,” and maintain a suitable formal tone throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic sequence: it introduces the complaint, describes the purchase and damage, then moves to the attempted return. “Firstly” and “Secondly” help signal this order, and the reader can generally follow the main events. However, the progression is interrupted because the final sentence stops at “but,” leaving the return episode unresolved and preventing a clear closing or request. The first long paragraph also combines the purchase, discount, damage, and reaction, so the key complaint is not easy to locate. Organise the letter into distinct paragraphs for the purchase and damage, the store’s response, and the requested solution. Add a closing sentence and use linking phrases that clarify cause and result rather than relying mainly on numbered transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for a complaint, including “disappointment,” “collection,” “stain,” “pocket,” “frustrating,” and “refund.” These choices make the situation understandable and show an attempt to describe both the product and your reaction. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, such as “damage jacket,” “tear,” and “damage piece”; these make the description less natural. Spelling errors such as “yestraday” and “explanied” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise complaint vocabulary and check spelling and collocations. For example, describe the item as “a damaged jacket,” say that “the pocket was torn,” and refer to “the defective item.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including a sentence beginning “when I went home,” and the main events can usually be understood. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in longer structures, and several errors make the letter less clear. Examples include “an purchase,” “I was impress,” “I decided to buy 2 jacket,” and “When I came to returned.” There are also problems with verb forms and agreement in “the pocket were tear” and “your store has sell me.” The final sentence is unfinished, which leaves the grammar and meaning incomplete. Practise article use, past-tense forms, and singular/plural agreement, and divide long sentences into shorter, complete statements with accurate punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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